10
Commandments of End Dumping
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- Thou shalt not dump while on unlevel ground, for surely one day the load
will hang up on the low side and thy trailer will fall down beside thee.
Great oaths and sworn statements as to how many times thou hast dumped in
worse places will be to no purpose for their insurance company will forsake
thee and thy future employment prospects will be much in doubt.
- Thou shalt line up thy tractor with thy trailer before dumping lest thou
be branded as an idiot who tries to dump while jack-knifed and condemned to
an eternity of changing tires.
- Thou shalt be sure that thy PTO and pump are not engaged while traveling
upon the highways. The view of twelve miles of power and telephone cable
draped gracefully around thy hoist is not pleasing to the responsible
authorities and the sight of thy trailer body resting ever so gently against
the top of a bridge can stir them to such great anger that thou are
compelled to dwell in their municipal motel for many days and nights and to
be deprived of feminine companionship, strong drink and Monday night
football all during that time.
- Thou shalt not permit another rig to dump while alongside thine, to the
left nor to the right, lest the operator be lacking in skill and upset his
trailer on top of thine. The humor of such an occurrence may elicit smiles
and boisterous laughter from thy companions but, will not be apparent to thy
employer and should only be reported to him after determining that in
neither hand does he hold a tire billy or other blunt instrument.
- Thou shalt be certain that hydraulic hoses are in good condition at all
times lest a worn hose blow out when thou tryest to dump a 50,000 lb. load,
30 miles from town in 15 degree weather and thou findest it necessary to
unload it with a shovel 10 lbs. at a time.
- Thou shalt pay full attention to trailer as it goes up watching for any
leaning or rocking. If thee sees any thou shalt lower trailer immediately
before it turns over. Do this and thou will not be embarrassed forever.
- Thou shalt not allow rocks or any other commodity to spill from thy
vehicle lest they bash in the windshield of the Smokey following behind
thee. A calamity of that nature may cause thee to be considered a hazard to
the motoring public and unfit to wear double clutching boots, chain drive
wallets or other emblems of their profession.
- Thou shalt not permit bulldozers or loaders to make any contact with thy
vehicle, neither from the front nor from the rear, nor from either side, for
the appearance of thy vehicle will be much worse after such contact and the
rascal at the repair shop will demand cash in large quantity to correct the
damage.
- Thy tires shall be checked for adequate pressure daily and whacked with
a tire billy every time thou stoppest, lest thy first knowledge of a flat is
when thy C.B. comes to life with "Break, Break for Dum Dum Dump, Thou Art On
Fire!"
- Thou shalt become wise in the nature of the commodities thou haulest. Such
as; that if a load of lime is allowed to get wet, it becomes as gummy gelatin
and will stay in thy trailer forever, although a wet load of coal will present
thee no problems, except when it is very cold, it freezes solid as a rock. In
that way, thou shalt prevent many unpleasant surprises.
Blessed are the careful and wise, for they generally remain employed.
Author Unknown
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